Start the record
This is the habit the rest of the programme rests on. Five minutes a day, a record of what happened, written on the day it happened.
How to keep a record that helps
One line per incident. Date, time, what was said, what you did. Write it the same day, while it is still clear. Facts only. You can add how you felt on a separate line.
This is not for showing him. Showing it tends to start a new argument about the record itself. It is for you, three weeks from now, when you are told something never happened and you are about to believe it.
Keep it somewhere private: a notes app with a passcode, an email draft to yourself, or a notebook he will not read. If you share devices or he checks your phone, choose a place he does not have access to.
Writing on the day fixes the memory before it can be rewritten. It also, over time, shows you the pattern in a way single moments never can.
Write your first three entries now, from anything you remember clearly from the last week.
How clear-headed do you feel today, about your own life?
Looking back over this week, what did you notice that you had not let yourself see before?
Take this with you
From today, what happened is written down. That is the beginning of trusting yourself again.
Finished week 1? Get it read back to you.
This reads everything you wrote this week and tells you what it sees, quoting your own words, naming what shifted between days, and setting one thing to do next. It is not a summary. Your week 1 review is free.